Confusion...

Thinking about some of the things that came up in class today, I'm challenged to really dig deep into what makes some people offended at Leeper's teaching, and others delight in what he says. I've heard a lot of talk from classmates expressing their confusion, dislike, or even anger regarding the things he brings up. I myself am also confused and wrestle with a lot of these topics, but I'm eager to learn what is going on underneath it all.....so I want to just process my thoughts about this.

I think the main thing that makes us pull our hair out comes from a completely different initial approach to what is being discussed. By this I mean that we all grew up with various worldviews that have shaped and defined us until now, and now that these worldviews are being challenged our instinctive response is to back off or lash out - anything that will protect our space of comfort and confidence. And I mean this is not something wrong, its just a natural human response. But I think realizing what it is that we are doing is an important step to take if we are ever to start learning more about ourselves and about how to properly deal with our differences. The right thing, I have learned, is typically the hard thing. And it is honestly really hard to find this humility, to do this intense introspection. But I really think it is one of the first steps to seeing the truth for what it really is. I don't claim to know or see it yet...and I'm not even saying that everything Leeper says is necessarily the truth.....but yeah, I think this is where we can start.

Most of my life has been this process of breaking down assumptions, and learning the skill of discernment, which is a lot harder to do in practice than in theory. I struggle with my own desire to just have the answer and hold it tight, never let it go so that life starts making sense. And then I see how unsatisfying my perspective was, and I move on to another one - another way of processing whatever life throws at me. But this cycle goes on and on until I really don't know how to deal with life anymore because nothing makes sense when I try to makes sense of it. So I think the place we end up should be at the feet of Jesus, humble and begging for truth, for something good and right and real. Then, I believe, life begins to look beautiful again. I'm not saying it'll even make sense, at least in the typical understanding of the word, but it will be full of Jesus :)

I hope what I said isn't too abstract or hard to understand....it's just what i feel is right.